cat burglar

my cat, Obi, is not a graceful cat. he falls off banisters, beds, and laps frequently. it's really quite funny to see him proudly strutting along a window sill then suddenly loose his balance and tumble onto the floor (not landing on all fours, or even three of those four). he will immediately look around to see if anyone is looking and then hang his head for a bit pondering his un-cat-like reflexes and equilibrium.

however, Obi is superfeline in other ways. he can disappear and reappear silently without notice. I will look and look and look for him under beds, on shelves, in cupboards and not see any trace of his little perma-tux outfit. but as soon as he's hungry or wanting some lovin' he'll silently appear by my side. the most amazing trick this little cat has hiding under his jacket is the ability to walk through walls. you may be doubting me right about now, casting this post off into the realm of insane cat-obsessed woman land, but don't. it's true. there have been numerous occasions when i've purposely thrown Obi out of my room and shut the doors, only to be nuzzled awake in the morning by the cat who has either apparated through the wall or opened the door and closed it behind him. yes, it's true.

he uses this ability for evil though and this is where i'm starting to get pissed. the little bugger escapes into the Inn adjoining our apartment. he immediately goes to room 3 or room 4, jumps on the bed, and musses-up the covers. he then jolts over to the big plant in the sitting room and takes a pee in it! so as not to be caught, he swiftly runs back through the door and jumps into my lap like nothing's amiss. i'm tired of this insubordination! it can't go on! perhaps i should think about installing a steel door through which no live animal or superhuman feline can pass.